Hold Me Close (Bridgewater County Book 4) Read online

  “You sure as hell aren’t getting pregnant by an anonymous stranger,” Matt countered.

  Rachel was ours. There was no way in fuck anyone else was going to take her virginity. That pussy belonged to us. Yeah, we might be selfish bastards, but the tables could be turned. If she’d just stand still and listen to us, she’d know we belonged completely, and solely, to her.

  “You should leave. None of this is your business and I shouldn’t have said anything. God, now my bosses know my darkest secrets.”

  “We’re men, sweetheart. Right now, here? We’re not your bosses.”

  “Yeah, well, regardless, you’re in no position to tell me what to do. If I want to have a baby, then I have every right to do so.”

  She was right, of course. About everything. We were probably breaking ten different types of employee privacy rights laws just by being in the room, but we’d come this far, there was no fucking way we were leaving without telling her how we felt. She’d told us about being a virgin, we sure as shit could bare our souls, too. I took a deep breath and let it out slowly.

  “Yeah, you’ve said that. Again and again. And you’re right. But it’s our turn to talk.”

  She was quiet for a moment. Her brows drew together in confusion, which was easier to handle than her righteous indignation. “Okay,” she said slowly. “I’m listening.”

  I looked to Matt and he gave me a nod.

  “We want you, Rachel.”

  The words sat there for a moment, a physical presence in the room, hanging between the three of us, waiting for someone to say more.

  “You want me,” she repeated. Her voice held a question.

  “We want you,” Matt repeated, taking a step closer to her. “We want you in every sense of the word. We want your body, soul, and heart.”

  “We want you to be our woman,” I said. “For the long term.”

  She was staring blankly, like maybe she didn’t hear us.

  I looked to Matt. “Forever,” he added, as if there might be any doubt.

  Her silence was torture.

  When she shook her head it felt like a knife slicing into my gut. “I—I…” She cleared her throat. “I don’t understand.”

  Relief came so quickly it nearly knocked me sideways. She wasn’t saying no. Yet I hadn’t thought our words were very confusing.

  I reached for her hands and was grateful when she didn’t try to pull away. It was the first time I’d ever touched her and it seemed poignant that it happened in this moment. When I said these words. “We’ve known from the very beginning, Rachel. You’re the one for us.”

  “It’s always been you. Only you.” Matt stepped up beside me so the three of us were so close our shoulders were touching. We were a unit. A family. Now we just needed her to see that.

  She shook her head again but this time it seemed like she was trying to clear her thoughts. Like she was having difficulty making sense of what we’d just said. Had we given her too much space? Had we taken our plan so far that she didn’t think we were interested in her at all?

  Maybe it really was coming as a shock to her that we’d been lusting after her all these months. Maybe she hadn’t realized how serious I’d been when I’d told her how it could be between us if she was ours, or that we’d been joking. Was that why she’d given us the cold shoulder, because she’d thought we were playing with her?

  She glanced up at me, then Matt. “But, I’m not your type. I’m not…I’m not…I’m not good enough.”

  “What are you talking about?” Matt demanded. “Whoever said you weren’t good enough? I’ll kick his ass. Shit, Rachel, what kind of men have you been dating that you’d even think that?”

  Her eyes were wide as she stared up at him. “You said that. That day at the rodeo, you said yourself that I was out of my league.”

  I glanced at Matt. I knew he’d fucked up with her that night, but this? What the fuck?

  He looked like someone had just punched him in the gut. His mouth fell open and the blood drained from his face. He recovered quickly and cupped her chin in his hand. “Baby, you got it all wrong. When I said you were out of your league, I meant you were too good for every loser in that place.” His lips pulled up in a lopsided grin. “Including me.”

  “Oh,” she said softly. Her cheeks flushed pink and her shoulders relaxed. I could actually see the tension drain out of her small frame. “Really?”

  He groaned and I had to fight the urge to slap him upside the head for getting such a stupid idea into hers. Four months. Four fucking months of confusion because he’d said something stupid. Four months wasted. Four months where I could have done more with our girl than hold her hand.

  “Baby, I promise you, the moment I saw you coming, I knew you were special,” Matt continued. “I had this crazy need to protect you, to keep you from sullying yourself with the assholes and players who were at that rodeo. I know I went about it all wrong, and for that I am so sorry. Can you forgive me?”

  I held my breath as I waited for her response. When she finally nodded I let the air out of my lungs. On impulse, I pulled her into my arms and pressed her to me, my lips coming down on hers in a gentle kiss that left me aching for more. Yeah, this was what I’d been missing. The lush feel of her pressed against me, her breasts pillowed into my chest. Her mouth. I groaned. It was sweet and soft and perfect. And the way she gave herself over to it? Incredible.

  When I pulled back, she stared up at me with a dazed look on her pretty face. God, I couldn’t wait to see what she looked like when she was being pleasured. By us.

  I wanted to make her moan and beg and…shit, we had to get the hell out before I became an unwitting sperm donor right then and there. And I wasn’t taking her damn virginity in this place.

  I stroked her hair back from her face, trying to rein in the hope that was threatening to burst out of control. “I know I should phrase this as a question, to let you decide, but...no. You’re ours. We’ll date. Court. Woo. Hell, even fuck, but we’re not letting you go now.”

  When she bit her damn lip again, hesitating, I hurried to continue. “Let us show you how good it could be.”

  She licked her lips and I heard Matt groan beside me. My bet was I wasn’t the only one with hard cock in this room.

  “I don’t know if I can make you happy.” Her voice was so quiet I had to strain to hear her. “I don’t know what I’m doing…you know…in the bedroom.”

  And those words made my cock press painfully against the zipper of my jeans.

  “You let us worry about that,” Matt said. “Our priority is to make you feel safe, cherished, and happy. And well pleasured.” He winked, then slipped an arm around her waist and pulled her close.

  The bastard, I wanted to hold her. I only had a quick taste of her lips and I wanted more. She was like a damn drug.

  “Making sure you’re satisfied in bed is all part of the package,” he added.

  I looked around the sterile room with its fluorescent lighting. “Sweetheart, I can promise you this—if you come with me and Matt, you’ll have a far better time getting knocked up than you would if you stay here.”

  “That’s right. If you want a baby, you’ll get one from us. The old-fashioned way,” Matt added, his gaze heated as if he were thinking about filling her with his cum and making a baby.

  She giggled at that and I felt a surge of heat rush through me at the sound. Fuck, I wanted to hear her laugh every day of my life. But for now, I needed to feel her. Taste her. If I didn’t get her in bed soon, I might lose my mind.

  “I’m clean, baby,” Matt said. I was impressed he remembered something so important. “Been tested, even have the paperwork.”

  “Me, too. You don’t have to worry about anything with us,” I added. She was a virgin, so the chances of her having some kind of STD were slim, but surely she’d been tested by the sperm bank. I had no interest in having this conversation later. I wanted her mind free of any worry. I wanted her mind free of everything.

  She gave a nod, then grew serious. I could practically see her mind racing, trying to think ahead and plan for every outcome. Our woman was nothing, if not practical. “But what if I do get pregnant?” she asked. “I couldn’t ask you two to be fathers. It’s too soon, we barely know—”

  I put my fingers over her soft lips to keep her from finishing. Fuck, they were soft. And when her tongue flicked out and licked my fingers ever so slightly, I stifled a groan.

  “Haven’t you heard a word we’ve been saying?” Matt asked. “We’re in this for the long haul. As in forever. Ethan and I have always wanted a big family. We’ve just been waiting for the right woman.” By his shit-eating grin, it was clear he assumed this was a done deal. Her major objections had been overcome and now it was time to celebrate. Not just celebrate, but make a baby. “If you want a baby, then we’ll give one to you. But we’re doing this, like we said, the old-fashioned way. Our cocks deep in that virgin pussy filling you with our seed. Sound good to you?”

  I watched as she flushed at Matt’s words. He was the dirty talker. Those kinds of words were what got us into this whole mess in the first place, but we’d told her we wanted her. Hell, we were standing in a fucking sperm bank. It was time she knew what we’d do with her, how she’d get that baby she wanted so badly.

  “Who do you want first, sweetheart? Who are you going to let open you up for the first time?”

  Rachel glanced between the two of us and she bit her damn lip again. A slow, shy smile spread across her face. “That’s not fair,” she replied. “I can’t pick. Surprise me.”

  Oh, we’d surprise her. We’d watch as her eyes widened at the pleasure we’d give her, how it would feel to have her men take care of her. Fuck her, fill her. Mark her. And the time to do so was now.

  CHAPTER EIGHT

  RACHEL

  Surprise me? What had gotten into me? I was never that bold, especially with men. But they’d grinned almost wickedly at that and moved so quickly, I was sure my head was spinning.

  I had no idea they’d been so interested in me. Matt had made it abundantly clear I wasn’t what he was looking for. The brawny cowboy had told me outright and with embarrassing clarity.

  Then Ethan had been all bossy and dominant at the Barking Dog that night, but then nothing. Bam. It was like the two of them shut everything down. They never got within five feet of me, only looked me in the eye when speaking of ranch business and even then, it was with a cool indifference that told me all I’d needed to know.

  The two hot cowboys weren’t interested.

  But now? I felt nervous and hot, tingly and a whole lot confused. They wanted me. They had all along! They’d come all the way to Helena to stop me. To tell me the truth about their feelings.

  All this time I’d thought otherwise. I inwardly groaned at all the heartache and frustration that could have been skipped. How many nights had I lain awake, bothered and miserable? Too many. Enough that I’d decided to get pregnant on my own.

  And that plan was not something they liked. Oh no. Their Neanderthal ways were showing. They wanted me and if I was going to have a baby, they were going to fuck me until we made one.

  Holy hell. My pussy ached at the idea, yet I was also petrified. I’d told them the truth, I wasn’t good at intimacy. What if I freaked on them?

  As Ethan helped me gather my things, Matt got on his phone and I heard him booking a room at a nearby hotel. I watched them with wide eyes, taking in their well-worn jeans that molded perfectly to their grab-worthy butts and powerful thighs. Matt was leaner than Ethan, but his shoulders were broad and well defined in his gray t-shirt. Ethan wore a plaid snap shirt and with the sleeves rolled up, I couldn’t miss the corded forearms tanned from their time outdoors. And all that male goodness was going to be mine to touch and grab and lick and….

  Matt hung up, gave Ethan a quick nod, held out his hand for me. Oh wow. A hotel? Now? When they said they wanted to get started with the baby making, I hadn’t realized they’d meant right this second. I’d barely begun to process the fact that these two sexy, charming, outrageously hot men were interested in me. No, not just interested. They wanted forever.

  That word gave me a thrill. Forever. I couldn’t believe they’d actually said that. Heck, I still couldn’t believe they wanted me. Me. The twenty-six-year-old virgin. Their prudish, prim office manager. They could have anyone they wanted and they wanted me.

  I just hoped they wouldn’t change their minds after one night in bed with me. What if I froze up?

  I pushed that thought to the side. They were grown men—Bridgewater men. I knew how it was. I’d watched Bridgewater relationships unfold around me my entire life.

  If Ethan and Matt said I was the one for them, then I needed to trust them. They knew what they wanted. They’d just been idiots and hid every dang sign. I might be a virgin, but I wasn’t clueless. Now it was obvious of their interest. Why had they been so good at hiding it all this time?

  “Are you all right? You look a little dazed,” Ethan said as he led me out to the parking lot. The sun was shining and it was warm after the cool, antiseptic feel of the clinic. His hand was at the small of my back and it felt…reassuring. He hadn’t touched me before the kiss. I didn’t even remember a handshake. But the kiss? God, had that been good. My lips still tingled.

  Dazed? Um, yeah.

  I nodded. “I’m fine.” Just reeling from the fact that my life had gone from humdrum to the stuff of fairytales in the span of ten minutes. I wasn’t getting sperm from a test tube. I was getting it right from the source, times two.

  Two guys were going to take me to a hotel and fuck me, most likely six ways to Sunday. These things didn’t happen to people like me. That was because I was a virgin. But now? Or soon, I had a feeling it was going to happen quite a bit if the looks on these guys’ faces was any indication.

  But it was happening. As Ethan helped me into Matt’s truck it dawned on me that not only was it happening, but we’d be consummating the relationship in a matter of minutes. I would no longer be a virgin.

  I sucked in air and tried to steady my breathing. This time it was Matt who gave me a look of concern. I managed a thin smile and he turned back to driving.

  The hotel was just down the road, so we were there in no time. It was all happening so quickly. Too quickly. By the time we reached the room and they’d closed the door with a loud click behind us, full-blown panic had set in.

  I didn’t know what I was doing. And once they got me into bed, they’d see that. What if I let them down? What if I froze up like I did every other time I’d tried to get close to a man? What if I couldn’t please them? What if they didn’t like my body and they changed their minds? I had a horrible image in my head of what their expressions would look like when they finally realized the woman they were going to claim was a dud.

  Oh god, it would be too humiliating. I couldn’t do this. I was only setting myself up for heartbreak and disappointment.

  I was so caught up in my paranoid thoughts I didn’t realize Matt and Ethan had stopped in front of me and were watching me with concern.

  “Breathe, Rachel,” Ethan said, putting his hands on my shoulders.

  The hard feel of them gave me something to focus on besides my crazy thoughts and I looked up at him. I felt the heat of his palms, the squeeze of his fingers, the weight of his touch.

  “Breathe. Slower. Good,” he crooned.

  Matt stroked his hand over my head, his fingers sliding through my hair. “Fuck, baby, we’re not going to hurt you.”

  I shook my head. “No, it’s not that.” I closed my eyes, sighed. I’d screwed up already. “I’m not scared of you.”

  Both men frowned as they loomed over me, blocking most of the light from the hotel room’s window.

  “Then what is it?” Ethan asked, his voice soft.

  “I know we’ve fucked up before, but you know the truth now. We’re here for you. All of it.” Matt reached for my hand and I was sure he noticed how cold it was. “Baby, you can tell us anything.”

  Even this? Tell them why I was ruined for them? That I was frigid? For the first time since it happened, I found that I wanted to tell someone. No, not just someone. I wanted to tell them. I needed them to know why I wasn’t good for them, why I’d never give them what they needed. They were very virile men—pheromones pumped off them in waves—and I doubted I could meet all their needs.

  I did it quickly, like ripping off a Band-Aid.

  “There was this guy…in college.”

  Both men stepped back as if they suddenly realized this was a serious topic. It wasn’t something simple like I was worried it would hurt the first time. Yeah, I worried a little about that too because these guys, I was sure, were huge, if the rest of them was any indication.

  Matt kept my hand in his as he led me over to the bed. I sat on the corner while they tugged the room’s two chairs to face me. Ethan leaned forward, put his forearms on his thighs, his dark eyes focused squarely on me. While they’d been ready to take me to bed, there was no hint of that need now. They were interested in what I had to say, what made me upset. Two rugged, handsome faces looked at me. Waited.

  “I was in college. I’d dated some, nothing serious.” I shrugged. I didn’t have to explain what serious meant to them since I’d already told them I was a virgin. “There was this one guy, junior year. It was our third date. We hadn’t done anything more than kiss.”

  Matt’s hand squeezed mine and I looked to him, his square jaw clenching. Was he upset I admitted I’d kissed someone else or because he had an idea of what was to come?

  I took a deep breath, let it out. “He picked me up at my dorm room and came inside. We were supposed to go to a party, but he said he wanted to have a party with only me.”

  I felt nauseated remembering the cheesy and gag-worthy line. Then, I’d been a little excited. Flattered.

  I flicked my gaze between the two. They were waiting, too damn patiently. There was no way I could get out of this now.

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